The pale moon shone down in the clearing as the sun finished setting in the west. In the growing darkness, a hunched figure emerged from the trees to stand in front of the cave and wail in despair at the large piles of bones in front of her. A smaller figure stepped into the moonlight as well, slowly and trepidatiously approaching the first figure from behind.
“What do we do now, Treshigan?” asked the whimpering voice. “Do you think the master will forgive us for failing him?”
“What do we do now?” Treshigan repeated with derision dripping from her words. “I think the answer to that is pretty obvious, Mutt. You say goodbye to your pathetic excuse for a life, and I say goodbye to my beauty and power. I wouldn’t be surprised if we both find ourselves as nothing more than walking corpses by midnight tomorrow.”
“Come now,” said a third voice, from just beyond the shadows of the nearby trees. “After all, if nothing else, Vdekshi is a master who is so fond of second chances. Even third, fourth, and ninetieth chances in your case, Tresh.” A tall, thin figure emerged from the trees with skin as pale as the moonlight. He was dressed in elegant clothing, and his smile seemed to hide a sinister delight known only to himself.
“He sent you to retrieve us already, Laronius?” asked Treshigan with both fear and contempt. “He must trust me even less than I thought.”
“Oh the master doesn’t trust anyone,” said Laronius with a look of mock surprise. “Not even me, and I’m his most loyal and faithful servant.”
“You mean his most obedient lap dog,” snapped Treshigan.
Laronius clicked his tongue. “Tsk, tsk. The words of a witch really can hurt, can’t they?” Laronius said, turning to Mutt. “Still I suppose it’s true. I have been following you for quite some time. With all the power Vdekshi gave you, the master wanted to know how well you were using it. Walking around in broad daylight? Making yourself look beautiful to a bunch of mangy dragon hunters? I think we may need to have a talk about budgeting your resources, Tresh.”
“Still,” said Laronius, regaining his sinister smile, “what’s done is done. And as I said, Vdekshi is so fond of second chances. Let’s see what kind of second chances are available here, hm?”
“There’s nothing of use here,” said Treshigan. “That idiot Tarun burned all the bodies so there’s nothing but ash and bones for you to reanimate.”
“Ah, but you haven’t got the eyes I have, Tresh,” said Laronius. “Mutt, do you see those four slightly raised mounds over there?”
Mutt nodded his head, obviously too afraid to speak to Laronius directly.
“Good Mutt,” Laronius said. “Now to the trained eye, one can tell that those are shallow graves. Still quite fresh, I believe. Shall we see what treasures we can find inside?”
Laronius floated above the ground and hovered over the area where the four mounds were. He pulled from his pocket a large silver and ruby ring that he placed on his finger with great flourish. “A gift from the master,” he said to Treshigan. “Only his favorite lap dogs get to play with these.”
Laronius closed his eyes, extended his hand, and began chanting. Soon the ring on his finger began to glow red in the darkness, and the dirt on top of the mounds started to stir and move.
“Ah, Krall,” Laronius said with a grin. “I was wondering when you’d come back to us.”
First, let me congratulate you on finishing a book. I didn’t keep coming back each week just as a favor to you–I really did want to know where your story was going.
So…congratulations on finishing a book!
Okay, now it’s question/comment time. The epilogue reveals some interesting news. The fact the Treshigan is working for Vdeshki was more or less revealed earlier when Krall recognized her. It was only natural that Vdeshki would have had a set of dragon hunters to replace Krall. So let’s move on to actual news. It appears that Treshigan has a “mana pool” or some kind of magic budget limit. If Sho Thym has any similar magic budget limit, we have yet to have any hints of it. The workings of magic in this world remain mysterious. I”m sure you’ll explain more in later books.
Is Krall coming back? Even after being burned? What kind of shape will he be in?
A piece of feedback: your text contains no reaction of Sho Thym at all to the news of the death of the dragon hunters. He says nothing, does nothing, thinks nothing. That just feels like a glaring gap to me. I think just a sentence of Sho Thym registering shock (or what ever emotion you want) would help a lot. I’d think it would feel better if Sho Thym and Dawnold had a chance to exchange what they’d been up to, but maybe you feel that would clutter things up.
I could go on, but I think that’s enough for now. Do we really get to start the next book next week?
I do think I agree with the previous comment, in that it felt a bit… Short, not seeing any reaction at all on the part of Sho that his newly found friends, & possible helpers in the quest for his parents, have died… Also, if he sees, or even thinks he sees that purple poison on his best friend, one would think there’d be a stronger reaction…
Any chance that you’ll be joining us tonight in some fun activities at the church?
What better way to be the Master than to appear to be the commanded, that way any “Competition” would end up taking out the decoy rather than the true “Power” of the operation, thus allowing stealth & secrecy, as well as intrigue…